Leslie Lindon ’88
When Leslie Lindon ’88 read the recollections of other Bruins in a recent edition of Alumni Connect, she began thinking of her time on campus and the journey that brought her to Westwood. That reflection led her to write a heartfelt and cathartic message to the Alumni Association.
“I cried when I wrote it,” Lindon said in a phone conversation. “I had never told the story before. It took courage because it's not an easy story to tell; I was very ashamed of what I went through. And I still am probably. But every time I've been brutally honest with people, I've always had a good result and a good response. And even though it's a little scary to have to tell you the real truth, it's just amazing to get a positive response when you're not expecting anything.”
Lindon’s message spoke to the difference that one person can have — both positive and negative — and how the right person at the right time can have a cascading effect on the lives of a person and their family members.
Leslie Lindon, ballerina, age 4I came from an abusive home when I was a very young girl. Violent acts occurred on a weekly basis and I was exposed to terrible verbal abuse and threats of death as well.
But I had a dream of being a dancer since before I was even five years old. My mom was still alive then, and she put me in the local ballet school when I was four years old. She knew my dream.
But fate stepped in and when I was 7 1/2 my mother and father divorced and my father got full custody. I never saw my mother again, except when she died six years later.
Dad thought ballet school was worthless and a waste of money, so my lessons stopped right then. He often told me how worthless I was and I would not amount to anything in life at all! When I was 10 years old he asked me what my future job plans were. When I told him "a dancer," he laughed very loud and then got angry and berated me for over an hour. He said it would be best to learn typing so I could be a secretary or admin assistant. He told me I'd be lucky if I even finished high school! He said he didn't think I would. We NEVER had a conversation about going to college or anything like that.
I left home at 16 years old and one year later I completed high school after I returned from a trip to Europe with my best friend.
In 1981, I boarded a Greyhound bus and took a three-day bus ride to Los Angeles with my own money to pursue MY dream more seriously after doing four years of various dance training, vocal and musical theater training in my home town of Toronto.
I had no money but started a restaurant job right away and enrolled at Santa Monica College Dance Department immediately that same fall. I was lucky to have the most amazing teachers there, focusing on proper alignment first and solid technique for ballet. I was in heaven taking as many classes as I could afford and working with the late, great Alma Hawkins for choreography class.
The SMC dance director told us one day that the UCLA Dance Department was going to be holding their annual auditions, and she encouraged many of us to go. I had no plans to attend the audition.
“Why should I? I'm not college material,” I thought. Also, I was poor. I had no money for college.
But my co-students would not stop pushing me to go to the audition! They all kept insisting I should go anyway! The dance director said it would be good experience for me to do the audition. So, I decided to do the audition, just for the experience of it, and to please Ms. Gold, who was one of my teachers at SMC.
I can tell you I even get emotional today remembering that first audition at UCLA.
I tried very hard but inside I was saying to myself, "Don't get your hopes up kid because you don't have ANY chance here!"
Two weeks later I was notified I was accepted into the UCLA Dance Department as a junior. I was absolutely shell-shocked!! Not even as a freshman, but as a junior!
Next, I was directed to the undergrad academic counsellor, Wendy Urfrig. Yes, I still remember her name easily because she is a hero to me! I NEVER would have been able to attend UCLA without her kindness and determination to help me.
I had taken Canadian history courses but not American History. There were SO many challenges to overcome with my entrance, notwithstanding I had no money. Wendy determined I was a 22-year-old, unsupported student and helped me apply for a Pell Grant and other financial assistance so I could enter the program in fall of 1983.
UCLA is about giving CHANCES to people!
My time at UCLA is one of the BEST memories of my life! I DID get my B.A. in dance after all! And that B.A. degree later enabled me to attend graduate school on a full dance scholarship. (109 of us auditioned and nine were chosen for the dance scholarship.)
My UCLA B.A. degree has helped me to attain several jobs that required a college degree and gave me confidence I'd never had. I also still retain friends from my time at UCLA and recently I’m re-connecting. UCLA is also a community that I love. UCLA saw my hardships clearly before I even did! And they helped me!
What internationally famous university does that for anyone? UCLA does. UCLA has heart!
Nobody ever knew the circumstances I had come from back home because I was ashamed. This is the first time I've spoken of it.
I am FOREVER grateful to Wendy Urfrig, Ron Brown, ALL my wonderful teachers and The Regents of the University.
Thank you, thank you, thank you UCLA!
In a conversation as open, honest and revealing as her message, Lindon elaborated on her experience at UCLA and her life since graduating.
A pregnant Lindon poses at Kaufman Hall (Photo credit: Lori Sash '85)“I remember Wendy like it was yesterday, she was an amazing person,” Lindon reminisced. “She didn't have to do what she did but she did it. I have no idea where she is or how to contact her. But if I could contact her, I would I would send her the biggest thank you card that I ever could!
“I bet you Wendy has no idea the impact that she made on my life. And it was big. I know her job was as counselor and she was supposed to try and coordinate for me. She knew my situation had challenges. She went above and beyond. She is the reason that I went to UCLA. She's the reason that I finally got in and she is the reason why I had that wonderful experience.”
After receiving a full scholarship from another university for graduate study, Lindon’s life took an ironic twist, when the father, who had been so dismissive of her future, was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig’s Disease). He would need constant care and he lived alone in Canada. Lindon was married with two children by this time (her first having been born during her time at UCLA), but felt an obligation to help. Initially, she tried to do so from 3,000 miles away. Then, when her father fell and broke his ankle, she traveled to him and hired an at-home nurse as the accident accelerated his decline.
“Being the person that I am, I wasn't going to let the way he treated me define who I was,” she said. “I still gave love to my dad. I didn’t want him to feel alone or abandoned when I knew he was facing the biggest fight of his life.”
She also didn't want to leave school because her dream was within sight — and she was on scholarship.
Musical theater“I was in the place of my life where I wanted it to be: I was going to get this degree and I was going to start teaching dance at a college or university. I was going to show my dad how wrong he had been about me. That actually became a very strong motivator for me and it worked very well because I was fully determined and on track to prove him 100% wrong.”
The situation eventually took its toll on her. She became depressed and started to miss classes. Within two weeks of returning from Canada, she knew she was in trouble and went to the university’s medical office seeking help. On their advice, she decided to take a leave of absence and, ultimately, traveled to Toronto to be with her father, sleeping in the hospital as he neared the end of his life.
Her unusual living situation resulted in her missing some crucial communications from the university and Lindon eventually got the news that the department was revoking her scholarship. Lindon was forced to drop out of school, which was a bitter disappointment.
Despite her graduate school experience not ending well, her accomplishments at UCLA could never be taken away from her — and they meant everything.
“My dad knew that I graduated from UCLA before he died, so he couldn't say [anything] to me anymore. That was an important hurdle for me to pass. I think he looked at me a little bit differently after that. I wasn’t just a little loser girl anymore.
“It had a far-reaching impact for me. It wasn't just me getting an education. It was me actually validating myself as a person, as a creator maker, as a dance maker and as a dancer. Just having UCLA on my résumé has been a positive for me.”
Needing to help support her family, she had to enter the working world — but not in the occupation she had envisioned. She wanted to give her children the upbringing that she had only briefly enjoyed and make that positive difference in their lives that, for most of her own childhood, was missing.
“Even when you think you don't have anything left to give, you give more because you know when it's your own child, you're going to do as much as you can.
Lindon became a human resources and payroll specialist. She had done well in accounting in school and had worked on the books for her father's business, so she worked my way up from accounting jobs into doing payrolls.
Yet, she confessed, "It was never what I planned to do. I was going to work in arts/dance education, hopefully at a high school, college or university. I was teaching ‘Music for Dance’ at graduate school which was perfect for me with my strong music and musical theater background."
Lindon still has aspirations to revisit her first love. At the moment, most of her time on stage comes as a backup singer in a band (The Generators) — and she’s helped with some of their choreography as well.
“That's really who I am. I'm a dancer and choreographer first. I always thought that once I retired I would probably do musical theater production on the side because I love it. I never thought I'd be singing with a band ever!”
Lindon has volunteered at food banks and church, and is currently volunteering with CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates) of Orange County, which helps children in the foster care system.
“I'm very aware that me and my brother, who didn't live very long [he died in a motorcycle accident in 1985], could have easily ended up in the foster care system,” Lindon said.
Wendy Urfrig TempleLindon was relieved to share her story after all these years. She said, “I have a lot of other reasons for loving UCLA. It helped me to survive. It helped me to be Leslie, the girl that's deep inside me. My love for the art of dance kept me focused and away from self-destruction, which was a big risk for me with no mother and an emotionally abusive father. UCLA has heart as far as I’m concerned.”
After this interview, the Alumni Association reached out to Lindon’s academic counselor Wendy Urfrig Temple ’71, M.F.A. ’73, who knew little of the drama that had taken place in Lindon’s life. She remembered Lindon and after reading what she had written, her response was, “Oh my goodness. I'm overwhelmed. I was the academic counselor in dance and world arts and cultures for 33 years. I truly loved my students...it's nice to know I might have had an effect on at least one!”
Lindon and Temple were able to exchange correspondence and have made plans to reunite so Lindon can thank her in person for the tremendous impact she made on her life many years ago.
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